so my reading agenda is currently to finish Winter’s Tale sometime soon. don’t quite know why i’ve stalled on it, but i’m hoping to pick it up again and finish it. it’s not that i’m disinterested, i just keep getting distracted. when that’s complete, i’ve got Anjelica by Sharon Shinn sitting on my shelf. she’s apparently written a bunch of books about this world she’s crafted, but this is a prequel so i didn’t feel like i’d be screwing up too badly by reading it first. the fact that it’s stand alone was appealing.

then i’m eyeing my old beat up copy of Dune. haven’t read it since i was a teenager. loved it then and i’m curious if i’ll still love it now. perhaps i might even understand it a bit better with age as i did with Robin McKinley’s Hero and the Crown.(my favorite book of all time) listened to a podcast yesterday by a woman a few years older than me that also loved Hero & Crown. i’m just now figuring out that it came out not long before i read it. i had very sporadic book buying experiences as a kid, not having an allowance and only actually purchasing books a few times a year. it was shear luck that i happened to get my hands on the copy that i still own and read yearly (sometimes more). it introduced a new kind of female into fantasy. gone was the damsel in distress, now she was a fiery woman with a desire for valor and a mission to save her country. she was Eowyn as she could have been with a bit more fleshing out (though E is not so bad in the Professor’s book, she’s quite fleshy for her time). sure there’s a dragon and swords and magic, but it all feels so natural. it just works and none of it feels forced.

which brings me around to the talk i had last night with my two best friends. i gave them a new story to read and they gave me some great constructive criticism on it. i get my head stuck so far up my worldbuilding ass that i forget to put in character motivation. i play things too safely as well. these things aren’t news, really, but were a bit more crystallized in my brain. we talked about how much of my way of moving through the world is reflected in my work. how i, personally, am very reserved. i’m gonna use a nasty word here so be prepared. my personality could be even described as conservative (told you it was nasty). obviously if any of you have read a single entry in my blogs you’ll know that i don’t mean this in the socio-religious political sense, and if you do, you should go read some back entries! i am not a risk taker. for those who’ve seen Clerks, i’m fucking Dante. i don’t like to rock the boat.

as i reread some of the things i’ve written, plot ideas i have and such, i can see quite clearly how much this is effecting my writing. my art tends to be a bit more adventurous. somehow my visual projects make it easier for me to risk it all. i’m hoping it’s simply that i haven’t been at this writing thing long enough yet and that risk-taking is a skill that can be learned, a sense that can be developed. here’s to working on it!